Living away from your children after a divorce can be one of the most difficult parts of the separation process. The shared custody portion of divorce can be an overwhelming prospect but with careful planning and excellent communication, you can improve the shared custody relationship and stay close with your kids after you move.
Parenting from a DistanceWhen the decision is made to move away from your child or the primary care giver decides to move away and takes your children with them, it becomes necessary to make a parenting plan that accommodates the distance. The children count on the parents to make the best decisions for them and keep them the priority regardless of the distance between the two parents.
Some of the more significant concerns of separating the parents include the following:

• Formalities Interrupt Spontaneity – The distance between the two parents forces there to be an interruption in the spontaneity of the relationship. Planning travel requires there to be much more formality in the scheduling of all of your time together.
• Balance Is Difficult – Having two parents intimately involved in their children’s lives provides a necessary balance. Forcing the distance between the other parent and the child creates an imbalance on the involvement of the distanced parent.
• Travel Disrupts Schedule – Traveling to visit a parent will often disrupt the schedule of the child and prevent them from participating in their activities.

Communication is the PriorityThe most important thing that you can do is communicate effectively with your ex-spouse and with your children. It is difficult for the child to not feel abandoned or unimportant. Even though both parents are no longer in a marriage relationship, it is vital to work towards a relationship that focuses on making this the best experience possible for the kids.

Tracy Duell-Cazes

It may take two to tango, but it only takes one to waltz out of marriage in the state of California. If your spouse is absent and unable to be located, you are still able to file and receive a divorce without the absentee spouse’s presence, or permission. However, it is important to follow all the correct steps to ensure the process is complete.

Fill out the Divorce Form

To start the process of a divorce you must complete two forms:

The Petition (Form FL-100), you list information about your marriage listing dates, children, property, and debts.
The Summons (Form FL-110) that mandates your spouse’s response and informs them what will happen if no response is given within 30 days.
There may be other forms to fill out, depending on your location, so be sure to ask the family law court clerk to have everything completed.
Service of Process

This is where a spouse is informed by a personal official notice that they are party to a lawsuit. However, in the case that you cannot locate your spouse, this may not be possible so the next step is unique and is known as, Divorce by publication. This only occurs after a judge is 100% convinced that based on your sworn declaration, and of the inability to find the Defendant after many proven efforts, this is the only option left. However, you must conduct a “diligent search” before the Service by Publication.

Diligent Search

A careful search includes many different actions to contact the dependent such as:

Searching directories both online and in phone books for where they may live.
Using a private investigator
Asking friends, family, and other relatives where they may be living or located
Asking the post office for information on possible forwarding address
Checking records with taxes to see if your spouse owns property
Getting in touch with previous employers or landlords
Submit Affidavit of Diligent Search

After this search, you must file a form for the court to show all the effort and avenues that were exhausted looking for your spouse and that you did your due diligence to locate them with no result.

​Tracy Duell-Cazes